Last week when I was coming home from work, I was thinking about a friend of mine and I decided to pull into downtown Nashville and pick up a “happy” for her at the LifeWay store on Broadway. My husband was having a bible study with our neighbor and this way I wouldn’t be busting up in the middle of their study and distracting them. While I was in LifeWay, this feeling came over me… one that I’ve had before in similar situations. I found myself wanting to do nothing but stay in that store and read all day long. There were so many books that I wanted to sit and read, so many authors that I love, so many journals that I wanted to fill with my thoughts, so many encouraging cards that I wanted to write and send to people.
I’m a leader at work, I majored in organizational leadership in college, I’ve lead worship for children and college students, I’ve lead bible studies, I’ve lead mission trips and in every single organization that I have ever been a part of, I’ve been in some sort of leadership role. And I love it. I love shaping and developing those that I’m privileged to work beside into being their best and how that will impact our company. I love leading others in worship and being completely humbled by God’s message beckoning the hearts of his people through song. I love studying the bible with women and learning more of how God’s speaking to my heart from how God’s moving in theirs. I love seeing that spark in a college students face while they are serving God in missions when they grasp that this is exactly what He was talking about in the Great Commission.
But today, I am not a leader. Today, on my day off, I get to be a follower. I get to sit on my couch (still in my jammies!), read through Angie Smith’s book, listen to my IF:Gathering Wednesday Worship Playlist on Spotify and write from my heart. I don’t have to be a leader today, I can simply be a follower of Jesus here in the quiet with nothing else taking precedence. I can simply be a follower to my husband as he leads my family and serve him by preparing our home for his return from work today. And as much as I love that God has equipped me since the beginning with this ability to lead, all I really want to do is follow, day in and day out.
All I have been able to think about since last week is how I want to do nothing else but write books that make women feel the exact same way. I want to write books that make women feel empowered and encouraged in their walk with the Lord. I want to write books that make women examine the redemptive power they’ve experienced in their life and the impact that’s made on their own faith journey. And that’s all I want to do. And I feel that is the best way that I can use the gifts and abilities that God has given me; to follow Him, to write what He’s teaching me in hopes of leading others closer to Him.
Would you pray for me in that? Would you pray that M and I would be faithful as we seek Him, as we follow Him and as we wait patiently for His timing?